Mariold Schwarzenplumber

The legend returns, now equipped with a red cap and a pipe wrench instead of an action hero arsenal. Arnold Plumbsenegger is here to show that age is just a number — especially when you’re still bench-pressing Thwomps and taking down Koopa Troopas with a flex. Hollywood may have swapped him out for the latest CGI, but in the Mushroom Kingdom, he’s the real deal. His catchphrase? ‘Hasta la vista, Bowser,’ followed by an old-school fist pump and a reminder to respect your elders... or else.