"I'M GOING TO LIVE" (Save & Continue..!)
Briefly popping my head out from my extended healing hiatus to update every / anyone who cared enough reach out after watching & reading my scream for help back on June 6th, when I reluctantly publicly documented the full context "I WANT TO LIVE" which is needed to understand how beyond blessed I am to be able to share this update today.
🔗"I WANT TO LIVE!" (Continue...?)🔗 Documented on Zora June 5th 2024 via 🔗Proof of life (continued...) Collection🔗
To understand the magnitude of this artifact, taking a few minutes to digest the context provided in the video and description of "I WANT TO LIVE" is needed.
I still have a long way to go and many months of recovery ahead so I'm afraid to even begin celebrating prematurely, but thanks to friend, mentor, founder, prolific collector, xDJ, legendary Music Nerd @cxy
I was just able to get the highly complex, risky & unrealistically priced - Reconstructive Jaw Surgery - done after years of barely existing pushing through life threatening reoccurring infections causing my body to always be in sepsis.
If you've never spoken to me one on one for extended period of time to get to know me, but always noticed the intensity and urgency in my tone through music, social media or artifacts documented onchain, you likely wrote me off as combative or holier than now as I struggled to adapt or go with the flow when it comes to the preservation, value and organic discovery of art.
Imagine you spent a life time, dedicating 4 decades to creative expression & making a positive impact on the world, experiencing every technological pivot along the way. Never compromising your integrity, and creating so many positive ripples along the way. Having that legacy documented across time.
Now Imagine, your faced with the reality that your life expectancy is set to a quickly approaching end. This is already something anyone would have difficultly processing. but now add the undeniable drastic changes happening across the internet the past few years. Algorithms, AI, Search engines purging history and information left and right and everywhere you turn to find solace begins adapting these broken systems that flatline discovery, control and genuine human connection.
easier to optimistically brush off as a healthy human with a future ahead. Not so much when it feels like your last days are being spent watching everything unravel when you're hyper fixated on the preservation of your existence and the desire to experience meaniful human interactions via the internet while your stuck in isolation.
Hopefully with context, it helps to resolve any misconceptions & snap judgements that could have & likely have formed. While I still feel it's honorable to critically think and use your / my voice to communicate honestly and often about observations pertaining to the Enshittification of our once fair, open, free and optimally functioning virtual landscape. Not having an uncomfortable, rapidly approaching human expiration timer ticking loudly in my head 24/7 for the first time since before the pandemic greatly lessens the urgency in throw myself into the fire trying save the world & my the memory of my place in it.
I look forward to returning to life as a human in the physical world and allowing myself to be present in that world, long enough to hopefully reprogram my mind and spirit to highly deprioritize my exposure to a virtual world that I know is going to force feed me algorithmic landmines that are going to feed my inspiration.
Thanks to C.Y. I'll soon be able to return to the life long cathodic ritual that kept me sane and balanced no matter what life threw at me. I.E. instead of ranting into a void typing novels online, I get to refocus and channel it back into the pen, paper & recording booth.
Beginning with finally recording (the still highly relevant) last official verse I intentionally wrote A decade ago.
📽️🎶🔗"Planet's In Orbit" - Produced by Potatohead People🔗 - 1/1 Video collected Oct 7, 2023 for 1.5 ETH by cxy
Feel's cosmic...🌌🪐🌎🌙💫
the same person who on collected that 1 minute, horrible video quality version of me reciting the last verse I wrote nearly a decade ago ended up being the person who would ensure it wouldn't be the last time the world would hear my voice.
🙏
In a vacuum, that doesn't sound to magical. Keep reading to have your mind blow & your faith in fate & the universe expand.
Backstory:
📖"In the summer of 2015, Dutch returned to Tampa, Florida.
Shortly after the move, he experienced a health crisis. He was rushed to the ER, struggling to breathe, and was diagnosed with sepsis from a severe dental infection. Immediately upon leaving the hospital, His mother took him to the dentist in hopes of finding a solution, but the complexity of his dental situation required a near 6 figure surgery. An unrealistic sum needed they could not afford. Even if they could, the complicated surgery came with a 80% risk of the left side of his face being paralyzed for the rest of his life.
This health challenge marked a turning point in Dutch’s musical journey.
He vowed not to write or record another song as Dutchmassive until his music could generate the income needed for his surgery.
▪
However, due to the unsettling prognosis from Dentist. He wasn’t going to waste time by holding out for hope while also punishing himself. He wanted to utilize his gifts while he still had the chance. So the next seven years, he recorded freestyles purely for personal enjoyment, without any intention of releasing them. This became one of his most cherished creative endeavors, as it allowed him to be vulnerable and have fun with music in a way he hadn’t before."📖
The Reluctant Clap: (Daily Rambles) Tascam Freestyles [2015-2022]. ⏲️Total Runtime: 283 minutes 🗣️🎙️
💽 Chapter I (2015-2016) 1/1 on Catalog Works
💽 Chapter II (2017) 1/1 on Catalog Works
💽 Chapter III (2018) 1/1 on Catalog Works
💽 Chapter IV (2018-2020) 1/1 on Catalog Works
📻 Chapter V (2020-2022) Editions on Supercollector
🎧🔗Backstory / Listen to Chapters I,II,III,IV🔗
🎧🔗Listen to / Collect Chapter V🔗 • 28 songs total • Individual tracks - $10 • or
Full Album - $280 •
🔗Download full series via Bandcamp🔗
Bonus Context: [🔗"S.O.S. Freestyle" (Daily Rambles) - prod by thxk_u🔗] (https://zora.co/collect/zora:0xaecf7d807b137eae8c67d24c4e0e66c1e6319266/5) Video Documented January 6th 2024 in the "10x12" in Tampa Bay before the rescue mission that led us to this day.
Nearly a decade later, the promise I made to myself to not write or record another song until my art can pay for the surgery needed has just been fulfilled.
still many months of healing ahead, before the final surgery happens. but thanks to C.Y. the world will now experience a future that includes new written & recorded vocals by Dutch <3
Eternally, Grateful.
If anyone would like to Help Fund the physical, 6 Cassette Box Set Release of "The Reluctant Clap" (Daily Rambles) [2015-2022] to help keep me busy during this healing hiatus while also serving as a symbolic step to close a very long chapter, before my next one begins.
You can visit the link below
🔗help Fund the physical release here🔗
Proof of life, Continued..
Executive Produced by: C.Y. Lee @cxy
🫂